The Felt are a rival gang to Spades Slick's Midnight Crew, residing in a manor on a post-apocalyptic Alternia. They are initially introduced during Homestuck's first intermission, in which they are shown to work under their then faceless gang leader, Lord English, while their origin and nature was otherwise left entirely ambiguous; Snowman and the enigmatic Doc Scratch being exceptions. Much later in the story, members 1-7 and 9-15 of the gang, all of whom shared a strange, light green appearance, were revealed to be a race of time-manipulating entities known as leprechauns, who were rewarded to players who somehow managed to proceed through a dead session, allowing them to conquer challenges which would be impossible (even by an impossible session's standards) otherwise. This showed that they simply stayed with Caliborn after his ascension, following his order until their death, and after their resurrection, following Slick's.
Powers and Stats
Tier: Unknown | 10-C | Likely 9-C | Unknown | 9-C | Unknown | Likely 9-A | Unknown | Unknown | Likely at least 9-C | Unknown | Unknown | At least 9-A | At the very least 7-A, likely 5-B
Name: The Felt (collectively), Varies (individually)
Classification: Time-manipulating alien leprechauns created by a dead session (members 1-7 and 9-15), Exiled Queen of Derse (Snowman), First Guardian (Doc Scratch), Cherub, Lord of Time, and unstoppable demon summoned at the end of the universe (Lord English)
Powers and Abilities: Time Manipulation (All), Superhuman speed (Itchy), Nigh-Invulnerability to pain (Doze), Able to interact with people's "Past Trails" and attack them from the future (Trace), Probability Manipulation and Invulnerability (Clover), Able to see people's "Future Trails" and know exactly where and when they will be located up until their death (Fin), Able to travel to a timeline or point in time in which an individual is already dead by inserting a pin representing them into a voodoo doll (Die), Immense intellect and leadership skills, Can negate temporal, magical, and reality warping abilities by using his Juju Breaker (Crowbar), Can build effegies to represent certain individuals, Can heal said individuals by sewing their effigies up, Can harm or kill said individuals by maiming or destroying their effegies, Can fix the fabric of existence by sewing up tears in Lord English's overcoat (Stitch), Superhuman Durability, Nigh-Invulnerability when his body is attacked, Harming him causes he and his attacker to be warped to a random point in the current timeline (Sawbuck), Can travel to any point in the timeline by using fire as a gateway, Able to create an endless number of clones by not extinguishing the fire he travelled through, should he need help in battle (Matchsticks), Able to create limitless duplicates of himself by hopping back in the timeline in increments of up to one hour (Eggs), Able to essentially enter suspended animation until a certain point in time by crawling in his broken oven and setting the timer, Said oven contains a seemingly infinite pocket dimension (Biscuits), Superhuman Physical Characteristics, Possesses a powerful minigun with infinite ammo, Has a collection of quarters, each with two different pool ball pictures; one on each side. When tossed, the member with the corresponding number will be summoned to that exact point in space and time. If the member represented on the opposite side is already present, they will switch places with the newcomer. If a member flips a quarter and their own number lands face up, they die (Quarters), Vastly superhuman strength, speed, and durability, Able to punch anything to another point in time. For instance, he punched Diamonds Droog into next week, Hearts Boxcars into a separate, outdated calendar year, and temporarily punched John, who was already "unstuck" from existence, out of the comic entirely (Cans)
Attack Potency: Unknown (Does not focus on direct damage or usually even confront enemies head-on) | Below Average Human level (His own ability makes him effectively useless for all combat purposes) | Likely Street level (Should be comparable to Fin) | Unknown (Never directly attacks) | Street level | Unknown, His ability ignores conventional durability | Likely Small Building level (Shouldn't be too far behind Slick and the rest of the Midnight Crew), likely much higher with his Uzi (Shot God Tier Jake to near death) | Unknown, Can ignore durability by destroying someone's effigy | Unknown (Hardly ever attacks without a weapon) | Likely at least Steet level (By virtue of his sheer stature alone, One of the more physically imposing members of the team, though he is never really seen fighting) | Unknown, though the fact he can summon an endless number of clones makes him deadly regardless of his opponent's durability | Unknown, though he becomes deadly when teamed with Eggs | At least Small Building level (Considered part of the Felt's muscle, Casually reduced Slick to swiss cheese with his minigun) | At the very least Mountain level (Superior to ARquiusprite, who himself is superior to Equius), likely Planet level (Once enraged, he traded blows with Dad Crocker, who should be equal to his pre-Scratch self, and thus comparable to Bro)
Speed: Effectively Infinite (Using his ability, Itchy can slow down all time relative to himself until everything but him is at a complete standstill) | Below Average Human (His own ability prevents him from moving very fast) | At least Superhuman, though he can attack his opponents from the future, preventing them from striking back | At least Superhuman, though his ability will likely allow him to be as fast as he needs to be, as no attack or ability that would significantly harm him or negatively affect him will be able to hit or work on him. He's just that lucky. | At least Superhuman | At least Superhuman | At least Superhuman | At least Superhuman | At least Superhuman | At least Superhuman | At least Superhuman | At least Superhuman | At least Superhuman | At least Hypersonic movement speed (Could catch ARquiusprite after being ticked off) with FTL+ to Massively FTL+ reactions and combat speed (Traded blows with Dad Crocker, who should be comparable to Bro and, by extension, Jack Noir)
Lifting Strength: Unknown | Unknown | Unknown | Unknown | Unknown | Unknown | Unknown | Unknown | Unknown | Superhuman | Unknown | Unknown | Superhuman | At least Class G, likely much higher (Vastly superior to ARquiusprite)
Striking Strength: Unknown | Below Average Human Class | Likely Street Class | Unknown | Street Class | Unknown | Likely Small Building Class | Unknown | Unknown | Likely at least Street Class | Unknown | Unknown | At least Small Building Class | At the very least Mountain Class, likely Planet Class
Durability: Unknown | Street level (Took a beating from Clubs Deuce's cane without a scratch) | Likely Street level (Should be comparable to Fin) | Unknown, virtually impossible to actually hurt due to the nature of his ability | Street level (Survived quite a while after being shot numerous times by Diamonds Droog, though he eventually bled out due to lack of medical attention) | Unknown | Small Building level (Survived a brutal beating from Slick) | Unknown | At least Small Building level (Slick repeatedly failed to inflict fatal wounds on him, though Sawsbuck was eventually killed when Slick managed to decapitate him quick enough to stop his ability from triggering), His ability makes it incredibly difficult to inflict fatal or lasting damage on him | Likely at least Street level (Should be more durable than Trace and Fin, Completely unaffected by being engulfed in flames) | At least Street level, likely higher | At least Street level, likely higher | Small Building level (Should be at least comparable to Crowbar and Slick, though he was killed by a surprise attack from Snowman) | At the very least Mountain level, likely Planet level (Took multiple serious punches from Dad Crocker, which were powerful enough to put even ARquiusprite in a state of awe)
Range: Melee range, universal with time manipulation | Melee range | Melee range | Melee range | Melee range | Melee range, his voodoo doll's range is multi-universal | Melee range, higher with his uzi | Melee range, effegies allow much greater range | Melee range, though his ability's range is universal+ | Several meters via size, universal+ with fire | Melee range | Melee range | Several meters via size, much farther with his minigun | Several meters via size, at least multiversal+ with his ability
Standard Equipment: Nothing notable | Nothing notable | Nothing notable | Nothing notable | Nothing notable | Voodoo Doll, Multiple pins representing different people | Uzi, Juju Breaker | Effegies of the Felt and other individuals, Sewing needles, Thread, Lord English's Cairo Overcoat | Nothing Notable | Matches, Fire extinguisher | Magical Egg Timer | "Time Travelling" Oven | Set of quarters, Minigun with infinite ammunition | Nothing notable
Intelligence: Most members of the felt (with the exceptions of Crowbar, Snowman, Doc Scratch, Lord English, and possibly a few others) seem to have relatively low intelligence, unable to use their otherwise devastating abilities to their fullest potential without a solid leader.
Weaknesses: Despite having effectively infinite speed, Itchy's reactions are still relatively terrible when using his ability due to his own carelessness. | Doze's ability prevents him from being of any real use in combat, other than a distraction. | Should Trace interact with someone's "Past Trail", a smart enough individual can use this knowledge and plan a trap due to knowing he must eventually show up there at some point, in the future. | Not really a weakness, but he can have things that are not inherently lucky or unlucky happen to him. For instance, while it is impossible to harm him, he can be lightly swatted with a newspaper, since while mildly annoying, it is not something that is necessarily "unlucky". | Because he leaves a trail, someone in the future can interact with Fin. | Despite being able to travel to a timeline in which whoever he wants is dead, this timeline is not guaranteed to be favourable. | None notable | Stitch lacks much direct combat prowess. | Knocking Sawbuck out without harming him does not trigger his ability. Should he be killed vast enough in an effective enough way (such as Slick quickly decapitating him while ignoring his durable torso), his ability will not trigger | None notable, though despite his powerful ability, he seems to not make much use of it. | A complete moron despite his dangerous ability. | A complete moron despite his dangerous friend, Essentially enters suspended animation after entering his oven and cannot exit until the timer goes off. | None notable | None notable
Key: Itchy | Doze | Trace | Clover | Fin | Die | Crowbar | Stitch | Sawbuck | Matchsticks | Eggs | Biscuits | Quarters | Cans
Note 2: All credit for the Felt fanart goes to doxolove. Go check out their work.
Members of The Felt
Doc Scratch: Alternia's First Guardian, as well as the cunning mastermind behind a great number of events in Paradox Space. He represents the cue ball and is named after the term for pocketing the said ball. Doc Scratch is an anomaly; a seemingly all-powerful being who assured his own existence and plays the role of "the devil" in Alternian lore. He is charming and well spoken, though these traits only hide how dangerous he truly is. In reality, he is another pawn in English's game, ultimately fulfilling his purpose of ensuring his own demise in order to summon his master.
Itchy: The first member of the Felt, Itchy possesses the power to manipulate time relative to himself, slowing it down to a complete standstill and granting himself limitless speed and movement. However, due to either his own carelessness or incredibly high-strung nature, he is prone to tripping and has rather poor reflexes compared to his immense speed.
Doze: The second member of the Felt, Doze possesses perhaps one of the most useless abilities on the team. He is able to slow down time by a ridiculous amount, but only for himself, meaning he essentially experiences the world at incredibly fast speeds while to everyone else, he's barely moving at all. While this has no practical combat purposes and essentially makes it impossible for him to win a fight, it does give him an absurd resistance to pain, meaning torturing information out of him isn't going to happen.
Trace: The third member of the Felt, Trace can view the "Past Trails" of others, allowing him to interact with them from the future. While this gives him the ability to severely injure or kill someone without a chance of them being able to fight back, Trace does not put his ability to good use and most often uses it to be a nuisance and nothing more. This is incredibly dangerous, as an intelligent foe will realize that, at some point in the future, Trace will show up at the location he interacted with them from, allowing them to set a trap.
Clover: The fourth member of the Felt, Clover's ability offers little help to his teammates, but complete invulnerability to himself. Clover controls the odds of probability and luck, meaning the outcome for any situation he is in will never be unfavorable. He cannot be hurt, killed, or lose, as those would be considered unlucky and thus cannot apply to him. However, he is still affected by events that are not considered to be necessarily lucky or unlucky, such as being lightly whacked with a rolled up newspaper.
Fin: The fifth member of the Felt, Fin's ability works similar to Trace's. Unlike his counterpart, Fin can instead view people's "Future Trails", allowing him to see everywhere they will be and everything they will do, all the way up until they die. However, this ability has the drawback of allowing others to interact with Fin from the future, similar to what Trace can do with everyone else.
Die: The sixth member of the Felt, Die carries with him a voodoo doll and numerous pins. Each pin represents a certain person, and when their pin is inserted into the voodoo doll, Die will be sent to a timeline in which that person is already dead. However, there are no guarantees the new timeline will be better than the last one. Should Die dislike the new timeline, he can remove the pin to return to the previous one. It is unknown how he acquired these pins, or if he makes them, similar to Stitch and his effegies.
Crowbar: The seventh member of the Felt, Crowbar is one of the few members who are actually intelligent and able to manage his teammates. This didn't go unnoticed, as Lord English made Crowbar the one in charge when he himself isn't around. Crowbar carries a Juju Breaker, which is mysterious artefact shaped like a red crowbar. The Juju Breaker, should it be used to hit another magical/reality manipulating object or entity, the special properties of said object or entity will be negated, immediately ceasing to work and having any effects currently in place cancelled.
Snowman: The eighth member of the Felt, Snowman is not a leprechaun and, instead, the former Black Queen of Derse from the Alternian Trolls' session. While she does not have any of the inherent time-manipulating abilities the leprechauns have, her death will result in the destruction of the Genesis Frog, meaning every version of the Alternian universe will cease to be. This causes everyone else to stop any and all fighting around her, allowing her to do as she pleases. She is the only female member of the Felt, as well as the only numbered member who is not a leprechaun.
Stitch: The ninth member of the Felt, Stitch possesses an effigy for each member of the gang, and is also able to make effigies for others, as well. Any damage done to a person will be reflected on their effigy, and Stitch can heal said person even when he is not present by sewing up the tears that appear on the effigy's body. Inversely, he can hurt or kill a person by inflicting damage on their effigy, causing the same damage to be applied to the actual individual. He is also tasked with sewing up the tears in Lord English's Cairo Overcoat caused by paradox shenanigans.
Sawbuck: The tenth member of the Felt, Sawbuck's ability is dependent on taking damage. As soon as he is damaged, both he and his attacker are immediately sent to another point in the timeline. Not only does this disorient his foe, but it also heavily mitigates the damage he takes, as it appears only the very initial harm caused carries over when his ability activates. However, knocking him unconscious or killing him fast enough via a vulnerable point, such as his neck, will not trigger the ability.
Matchsticks: The eleventh member of the Felt, Matchsticks always carries around matches and a fire extinguisher. This is because he is capable of traveling to any point in the timeline he chooses by using fire as a portal. He carries the extinguisher so that an endless number of paradox clones will not also come out of the fire, though he will allow this to happen should he be in a battle and need the assistance.
Eggs: The twelfth member of the Felt, Eggs possesses a magic egg timer which allows him to jump back in time by increments of up to an hour. By repeatedly setting the timer back, Eggs can create endless duplicates of himself and any allies in the area, allowing him to be much more dangerous than one would expect.
Biscuits: The thirteenth member of the Felt, Biscuits is most often seen with Eggs and owns what he believes to be a time traveling oven. He sets the timer, hops in, and then pops out later at the time he set the timer for. In reality, it seems he is just waiting inside the oven, and the oven itself does not actually travel through time. Regardless, it does seem to possess special properties, such as putting Biscuits into suspended animation so that to him it seems no time has passed at all or having seemingly limitless storage capacity.
Quarters: The fourteenth member of the Felt, Quarters is one of the more directly deadly ones, carrying a powerful minigun with infinite ammunition. He also owns a set of quarters which he has given to other members of the gang. Each quarter a different number on each side. When a quarter is flipped, the Felt member with the corresponding number to the face-up side will be summoned from another point in space-time. If the member who would be summoned from the opposite side is also present, they will switch places with the newcomer. If the member who flipped the coin has their own number come up, they will instantly die.
Cans: The fifteenth member of the Felt, Cans is by far the most powerful of the leprechauns earned by Caliborn during his session. Aside from his absurd raw power and durability, Cans can send anything he punches to another point in space and time. He punched ARquiusprite to another planet, Diamonds Droog into next week, Hearts Boxcars into a separate, outdated calendar year, and John, who had become unstuck from existence, out of the comic itself.