I call it Dante’s Syndrome. Meaning I think Dave and I gained the ability to peer into Hell. Only it turns out Hell is right here, it’s all through us and around us and in us like the microbes that swarm through your lungs and guts and veins.
~ John


"John" (real name unknown, no last name given) is one of two protagonists of John Dies at the End, and the titular character (he doesn't actually die at the end).

After a night of drugs leads him into the paranormal, John begins to eagerly pursue his heroic role and becomes obsessed with the paranormal. He took the pseudonym "John" - Dave claims this is because it is the most common name in the world.

Powers and Stats

Tier: 10-A. At least 9-B with weapons. Unknown with the Furgun

Name: John (actually a pseudonym)

Origin: John Dies at the End

Gender: Male

Age: 25 years old

Classification: Human

Powers and Abilities: Awareness of supernatural phenomena and creatures, access to a wide variety of weapons and objects suited to dealing with demons, ghosts, and similar beings, Soy Sauce grants him a varying combination of Clairvoyance, Precognition, Time Manipulation, Stopping, and Travel, Astral Projection, Enhanced Senses, vastly increased processing speed / intelligence for a varying amount of time, Reality Warping with the Furgun (It fires whatever he imagines).

Attack Potency: Athlete level (Physically superior to Dave, claims to have knocked people out with his bare hands). At least Wall level with weapons (Has access to many weapons, such as firearms, explosives, and chainsaws). Unknown with the Furgun (In the hands of Dave, it destroyed an army of Shadow Men with ease).

Speed: Normal Human. With Soy Sauce, he can think fast enough to perceive actions taking place within a microsecond.

Lifting Strength: Regular Human

Striking Strength: Athlete Class

Durability: Athlete level

Stamina: Peak human.

Range: Melee range normally. Further with weaponry, and much further when under the influence of Soy Sauce (contacted Dave from years in the past).

Standard Equipment: Assorted objects suited to dealing with supernatural creatures (such as Testamints [breath mints with bible verses written on them] and a stereo), firearms, melee weapons, and Soy Sauce.

Intelligence: Around average under normal circumstances, though he is fairly well-versed (by most people's standards, anyways) when it comes to the supernatural. John's intelligence is marred by his extremely poor education, alcoholism, impulsiveness, and generally self-destructive behavior, but he is a clever strategist even without Soy Sauce backing up his intelligence. When under the influence of Soy Sauce, John's intelligence increases exponentially, enough that he is able to construct a complex bomb and flamethrower from household objects and determine things and predict the future based on minute, imperceptible changes in people's expressions and voice, among other things.

Weaknesses: John is a self-destructive, impulsive alcoholic. Soy Sauce is very scarce, its effects vary and tend to be uncontrollable and the most beneficial ones wear off in a couple hours, and taking too much of it can have lethal effects.


Notable Victories:

Notable Losses:

Inconclusive Matches: